10-15-2009, 05:16 AM
He does not have a BEER GUT - He has developed a LIQUID GRAIN STORAGE FACILITY.
He is not a BAD DANCER - He is OVERLY CAUCASIAN.
He is not BALDING - He is in FOLLICLE REGRESSION.
He is not a CRADLE ROBBER - He prefers GENERATIONALLY DIFFERENTIAL RELATIONSHIPS.
He does not get FALLING-DOWN DRUNK - He becomes ACCIDENTALLY HORIZONTAL
He does not act like a TOTAL ASS - He develops a case of RECTAL-CRANIAL INVERSION.
He is not a MALE CHAUVINIST PIG - He has SWINE EMPATHY.
He is not AFRAID OF COMMITMENT - He is MONOGAMOUSLY CHALLENGED.
He does not GET LOST ALL THE TIME - He INVESTIGATES ALTERNATIVE DESTINATIONS.
It's not his CRACK YOU SEE WHEN HE BEDS OVER - It is MALE CLEAVAGE.